Lingering

Well, I'm back home in State College. When I left Friday afternoon I surely did not expect my dad to live through the weekend.

The weekend was one of intense emotion. It was hard to believe the change in my dad from the weekend before. He was basically comatose, with occasional times of being lucid and aware. One such time was when Mary Ellen and I sat on either side of him Friday evening and started to sing, "It Is Well With My Soul." He started to sing along!!!! My stepmother heard him and came into the sun room asking incredulously, "Is he singing??" He sang the whole way through the first verse with us, then seemed to slip back into unconsciousness.

I had a sweet time of singing a number of hymns with Jeremy as we sat by his side. Earlier on Friday when Jeremy had sung "Amazing Grace', my dad wept.

Also on Friday evening my brother in law Scott from New Hampshire called me as he drove home from work. He wanted to express his last words of appreciation to my dad, so we put my phone on speaker phone and held it by Dad's ear as Scott talked. We all wept. Afterward my dad made it very obvious that he understood who had been talking and he was tremendously touched.

Then my sister Betty (Scott's wife) called and we did the same thing, only now my dad insisted on holding my phone himself. Betty and her children, Merida and Isaiah, poured out their hearts to him and cried. Again we all cried. Then my dad held the phone to his mouth and said in his slurred way, "I love you so much, I love you so much, I love you so much."

We decided to call my sisters Rose and Barb and give them the same opportunity. Again each of them expressed their love and appreciation to him with tears, and again he told them by name that he loved them.

Saturday was much the same. Family members came and went. My late sister Janet's husband, Elvin, and his wife Pauline were there Saturday afternoon and I got this picture of them. Pauline lost her first husband to cancer and is a wonderfully compassionate friend to my stepmother.

Saturday evening a lot of us went to Mary Ellen's house for a drop - in party. Long before we knew what our dad's situation would be at this time, Mary Ellen's step daughter and family from Jacksonville planned a visit to Mary Ellen this weekend. We had not seen Kim for years, and had never met her husband and baby. So we had a great time there. I think we all needed a chance to laugh. (Unfortunately I had left my camera at my dad's.) I felt physically and emotionally exhausted till the day was over.

Sunday morning I was scheduled to lead worship for the first time in four weeks. I was tired, but it felt good to be at the piano and with the worship team and our church family. It was also special to have Jeremy there, as well as Sam and his friend Jennifer. We hung out at home in the afternoon, then spent a few hours at my dad's again. He had declined even further and there seemed to be no moments of joy. He did not seem to be aware of anything at all, and we cried and prayed that God would please take him home.

Dick left from there to return to State College. He is having his fourth and last chemo treatment today. I took Destiny home to Reading, came back to my dad's to get Jeremy and to see my dad one more time, went home completely exhausted, and spent some time getting my house in order.

I left at 7 Am to come back home to State College, just in time before Lori left for work. Seeing Austin was good medicine for my aching soul.

Today Jeremy is at my dad's working on a Power Point presentation of pictures and music that will be showing during the viewing. He is scheduled to go back to Florida tomorrow. We didn't think that would happen, but I guess it will. He will have to make a second trip to PA before long.

I know God is a compassionate Heavenly Father - my dad has always drilled that into my head and heart. But I admit I wonder why He is letting my dad linger in this condition for so long. How long, Lord, how long?