Today it is one year since I last saw my dad and experienced his transition from this earth to Heaven. Today I am simply reposting what I wrote last year on the night of October 1st.
My dad is finally home
Thursday afternoon I traveled to Lancaster County for my hair appointment. I stopped at my dad's first and it was very obvious that the end was near. It was so hard to see him laboring so hard to breathe, then stop breathing altogether for so long that we wondered if it was over. His hands were getting cold. I hated to leave, but went to my hair appointment.
When I came back there were various family members here. His breathing was harder than ever, his hands altogether cold, but he had a raging fever. Hospice told us to use cold compresses in his armpits, and we put a cold wash cloth on his forehead. And we sang and sang and sang. Songs about Heaven. One time my stepbrother saw a tear at the corner of his eye. After a while his breathing slowed down. Because I was the family member planning to stay the night, along with a hired nurse aid, I was shown where the phone numbers were that I should call if he should die during the night. The very thought was distressing. What if I couldn't keep my head together to make those phone calls at such a moment?
I went out to my car to get my bags and I cried, "Lord, please take him home while all these other family members are still here!!" I came in the house and my step brother, Lester, said, "Something changed. You'd better get in there." Dad's breathing had become very faint, with occasional gasps. Doris, Mary Ellen, my step mother, and her son Lester all gathered around him. The hired nurse, a sweet Nigerian angel, started singing the old worship song,
"I see the Lord, I see the Lord.
He is high and lifted up, and His train fills the temple.
He is high and lifted up, and His train fills the temple.
And the angels cry, 'Holy!'
The angels cry, 'Holy!'
The angels cry, 'Holy is the Lord.'"
We joined her singing between our tears and had beautiful three part harmony. The glory of the Lord filled the room. When we were sure he had breathed his last we cried some more. The nurse raised her hands and prayed aloud over us all. She kept proclaiming, "It is well. It is well."
Then the phone calls, more family arrivals, the Hospice nurse's arrival, the undertaker's arrival, and many more tears and sobs. We each took our turns kissing Dad before he would be taken away. Lester, who is a pastor, led us in a time of prayer as the undertakers patiently waited. It was a truly beautiful time for our two families to be united in our grief and our love for my dad and step mother. We ended by singing together Sweet, Sweet Spirit.
And then he was taken away and we sat down to make a few plans - viewing on Monday afternoon and evening, funeral on Tuesday morning.
Gradually they all left, and now I'm here with my stepmother. She just went to bed. We have peace knowing that Dad is finally at home with his precious Lord and Savior, he is finally free of his sick body, and he can sing and laugh again. But like my step mother said, "But he's not here." That is the hard part. The void that is left by the man he was. As Lisa said on Facebook - he was the most humble, loving man she ever knew. I know we can all say, "Amen."
I am rich to have had him for a dad. We are all rich - not in earthly wealth, but in the spiritual and emotional blessings that we are enjoying because of his love, because of his obedience to and passionate love for the Lord, because he honored the Lord in everything he did. The blessings of a righteous man are to a thousand generations. Thank you, Dad.
When I came back there were various family members here. His breathing was harder than ever, his hands altogether cold, but he had a raging fever. Hospice told us to use cold compresses in his armpits, and we put a cold wash cloth on his forehead. And we sang and sang and sang. Songs about Heaven. One time my stepbrother saw a tear at the corner of his eye. After a while his breathing slowed down. Because I was the family member planning to stay the night, along with a hired nurse aid, I was shown where the phone numbers were that I should call if he should die during the night. The very thought was distressing. What if I couldn't keep my head together to make those phone calls at such a moment?
I went out to my car to get my bags and I cried, "Lord, please take him home while all these other family members are still here!!" I came in the house and my step brother, Lester, said, "Something changed. You'd better get in there." Dad's breathing had become very faint, with occasional gasps. Doris, Mary Ellen, my step mother, and her son Lester all gathered around him. The hired nurse, a sweet Nigerian angel, started singing the old worship song,
"I see the Lord, I see the Lord.
He is high and lifted up, and His train fills the temple.
He is high and lifted up, and His train fills the temple.
And the angels cry, 'Holy!'
The angels cry, 'Holy!'
The angels cry, 'Holy is the Lord.'"
We joined her singing between our tears and had beautiful three part harmony. The glory of the Lord filled the room. When we were sure he had breathed his last we cried some more. The nurse raised her hands and prayed aloud over us all. She kept proclaiming, "It is well. It is well."
Then the phone calls, more family arrivals, the Hospice nurse's arrival, the undertaker's arrival, and many more tears and sobs. We each took our turns kissing Dad before he would be taken away. Lester, who is a pastor, led us in a time of prayer as the undertakers patiently waited. It was a truly beautiful time for our two families to be united in our grief and our love for my dad and step mother. We ended by singing together Sweet, Sweet Spirit.
And then he was taken away and we sat down to make a few plans - viewing on Monday afternoon and evening, funeral on Tuesday morning.
Gradually they all left, and now I'm here with my stepmother. She just went to bed. We have peace knowing that Dad is finally at home with his precious Lord and Savior, he is finally free of his sick body, and he can sing and laugh again. But like my step mother said, "But he's not here." That is the hard part. The void that is left by the man he was. As Lisa said on Facebook - he was the most humble, loving man she ever knew. I know we can all say, "Amen."
I am rich to have had him for a dad. We are all rich - not in earthly wealth, but in the spiritual and emotional blessings that we are enjoying because of his love, because of his obedience to and passionate love for the Lord, because he honored the Lord in everything he did. The blessings of a righteous man are to a thousand generations. Thank you, Dad.
5 comments:
It's hard to believe it's been a year, but in another way it seems so long. What a wonderful man, father, husband... he was
Thanks Jeanie for reposting this. It brings tears and I miss him so much. I can just picture him in Heaven walking with two good legs. And I'm sure he's singing and visiting people just like he did here on earth.
we will always have wonderful memories of our Dads. I know that our Dads are rejoicing
Wow! What a tribute to your beloved father! Your words brought a lump to my throat.
Hugs,
Kat
I remember hating to see that first year anniversary roll around. Somehow it felt like I could keep him closer when I could say, "Last year at this time we were doing such and so. . . and Daddy was there!" It just felt like he had slipped another notch farther away, and I just didn't want it to be. Your tribute to your dad and the word pictures that you gave me are priceless. I could feel the "Holy Ground" and it made me want to cry. It just never seems "right" that someone who is so life participant can suddenly be so "gone". Where would we ever be without the hope -- with out the KNOWLEDGE-- that this isn't the end -- that somewhere your Dad still lives -- more alive than he every was. Makes me want to shout "GLORY!!!" What a day that will be, when we all get together up there!
Thinking of you especially this week. Love you!
Post a Comment